About this Ministry of

Christian Conciliation & Mediation

Through this ministry we strive to resolve marital conflict with the aim of achieving reconciliation.  Disputes over substantive issues often can be resolved through cooperative negotiations.  This approach proceeds from a sound biblical foundation:  “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others”  (Philippians 2:4).

In other words, we also strive to share the experience of divine love – all to the glory of God.  In a nutshell this is Christian conciliation.

Referral to various marriage classes, counseling and communication assistance providers, support groups and other resources also might be appropriate.

If a marriage really is spiritually dead, then we will work with couples to make amicable arrangements to finalize divorce, addressing such matters as property settlements, alimony, parental responsibility, child support, custody, etc.  Hopefully, these matters can be resolved in a spiritually supportive environment to minimize the pain and disappointment inherent in the ordeal as well as to foster effective communication for constructive handling of on-going issues, e.g., raising a minor child, in addition to laying the groundwork for healthier relationships in the future.

Because divorce entails the termination of a sacramental relationship, it is profoundly regrettable.  It is also true that many who divorce report feeling abandoned by the Church during the process or too embarrassed to accept the support they might find in the Church.  It is our hope that through this ministry of Christian Conciliation and Mediation Christ’s love might be known even in the darkest hours and you will always feel part of the Christian family.

Our Christian Conciliator & Mediator

Br. Mark Andrew Jones, BSG, facilitates marital and general dispute resolution within a spiritual or secular context as you choose.

For more information or to schedule an appointment, contact Br. Mark Andrew at 561-504-3879 or at brmarkandrew@bellsouth.net.  Visit his web site for this ministry: at http://home.bellsouth.net/p/PWP-ChristianConciliation.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is Christian Conciliation?

A conciliatory process that emphasizes out of court agreements through mutual satisfaction of interests and growth in one’s relationships with people and with God.  In other words, the parties are encouraged to craft their own solutions without a judge, jury or other third party imposing a solution.  However, the objective of Christian Conciliation is not only a mutually acceptable agreement, but also, to the extent practicable, reconciliation and growth in one’s relationship with God and one’s neighbors.

What is Mediation?

Another voluntary and informal means of resolving disputes out of court through facilitated communication and negotiations.  It is less values-oriented than Christian Conciliation.

What is the role of a Conciliator or Mediator?

Br. Mark Andrew will work as long and as hard as it takes to fully explore and exhaust all possibilities for resolution, reconciliation and/or settlement.  While he might make suggestions for consideration and ask if certain proposals or ideas have been considered, he will not come up with his own solution and try to sell it to the parties.

What are the advantages over court litigation?

Why elect Christian Conciliation over litigation?

“A purely legal approach to resolving a dispute often heightens animosities and permanently destroys relationships.  In contrast, Christian conciliation encourages forgiveness and promotes reconciliation, which can preserve valuable relationships.”

“A court process usually fails to deal with the real causes of conflict, such as pride, selfishness, fear, vengeance, greed, bitterness, or unforgiveness.  In fact, the adversarial process, which encourages people to focus on what they have done right and what others have done wrong, often leaves the parties with a distorted view of reality and actually ingrains the very attitudes and behaviors that caused the conflict in the first place.  In contrast, Christian conciliation helps people to identify root problems and to make changes in their lives so that they will experience less conflict and healthier relationships in the future.”

Used with permission.  Excerpt from “Introduction to Christian Conciliation.” ©Peacemaker® Ministries.  www.HisPeace.org

Can I elect mediation without Christian Conciliation?

Yes.  Although we believe the potential benefits are greater with Christian conciliation, as a state certified county and family mediator Br. Mark Andrew will provide professional mediation services on a secular model, and he will do so without altering the ministry-focused fee structure.  While a secular model for the conduct of mediation might not provide as spiritually enriching and as potentially reconciling an experience as Christian Conciliation, the secular model continues to offer many benefits over litigation.

Should you discuss these options with your attorney?

If you already have an attorney, you should by all means discuss the subject with him or her.  We consistently encourage parties to consult with independent legal counsel before signing any final settlement agreement.  After all, such agreements can change your legal rights. Consulting with independent legal counsel is important since mediators and conciliators do not provide parties with legal advice or represent them in an attorney-client relationship.

Please note that although Br. Mark Andrew is an attorney licensed to practice law, he will not provide you with legal advice or legal representation.  Br. Mark Andrew is happy to work with any attorneys whom the parties have retained to advise or represent them during the mediation and/or conciliation process.

Should you discuss these options with your priest, pastor or minister?

Yes.  We do ourselves and our relationship with God a disservice if we do not seek spiritual advice “in matters of the heart.”

When acting as a conciliator Br. Mark Andrew is sensitive to the broad commonality of values and principles that are shared by major Christian denominations – be they Evangelical, mainline Protestant, Charismatic, Anglican or Episcopalian, Roman Catholic, Orthodox, or Reformed.  Br. Mark Andrew is happy to work with your priest, pastor, or minister during the conciliation process if you so elect.

The Peacemaker’s Pledge – A Commitment to Biblical Conflict Resolution

                © Peacemaker® Ministries.  Used by permission.  www.HisPeace.org

As people reconciled to God by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, we believe that we are called to respond to conflict in a way that is remarkably different from the way the world deals with conflict.[1]  We also believe that conflict provides opportunities to glorify God, serve other people, and grow to be like Christ.[2]  Therefore, in response to God’s love and in reliance on his grace, we commit ourselves to respond to conflict according to the following principles:

Glorify God

Instead of focusing on our desires or dwelling on what others may do, we will seek to please and honor God – by depending on his wisdom, power, and love; by faithfully obeying his commands; and by seeking to maintain a loving, merciful and forgiving attitude.[3]

Get the Log Out of Your Own Eye

Instead of attacking others or dwelling on their wrongs, we will take responsibility for our own contribution to conflicts – confessing our sins, asking God to help us change any attitudes and habits that lead to conflict, and seeking to repair any harm we have caused.[4]

Go and Show Your Brother His Fault

Instead of pretending that conflict doesn’t exist or talking about others behind their backs, we will choose to overlook minor offenses, or we will talk directly and graciously with those whose offenses seem to serious to overlook.  When a conflict with another Christian cannot be resolved in private, we will ask others in the body of Christ to help us settle the matter in a biblical manner.[5]

Go and Be Reconciled

Instead of accepting premature compromise or allowing relationships to wither, we will actively pursue genuine peace and reconciliation – forgiving others as God, for Christ’s sake, has forgiven us, and seeking just and mutually beneficial solutions to our differences.[6]

 By God’s grace, we will apply these principles as a matter of stewardship, realizing that conflict is an assignment, not an accident.  We will remember that success, in God’s eyes, is not a matter of specific results but of faithful, dependent obedience.  And we will pray that our service as peacemakers brings praise to our Lord and leads others to know his infinite love.[7]